Hello world!
After a long unintended hiatus (again), I’m returning to write this post. If you’re wondering why my blog has been pretty much dead for awhile the answer is simply, I’ve been unhappy. Rather than write about how life has been kicking me in the metaphorical balls lately, I figured radio silence was the most appropriate course of action. As they say, if you can’t say something nice, and all that jazz. I’m still working through some stuff but I wanted to get some stuff of my chest, so here goes.
First and foremost, I want to junk-punch the moron who decided it was socially appropriate to pretend that everything in life is fine when it totally isn’t. I mean really??! It sucks!
Imagine you are having a shitty day and one of your friends comes up to you in great spirits. What are you going to say when she asks about how you’re doing? “I’m fine” You could be going through some painful experience and rather than say you’re having a tough time, you lie.
Why is it that we are so ashamed of being upset/unhappy, that we’d rather lie our asses off and pretend that life is all sunshine and daisies? Mental health is such a stigma in the U.S. it’s ridiculous. Hell, you could admit to being an adulterer and you’d be better received than if you were to admit that you are depressed. It’s funny really.
Welp, let’s challenge the status quo. It starts with acceptance. It’s totally ok to have a bad day, week, month. Don’t be ashamed, understand that in life, there are hills and valleys and it’s not always going to be perfect.
- Be understanding, if you know someone who seems to be out of sorts.
- Be supportive, give them their space, but if they need an ear, be there for them.
- Be respectful, when they do come to you, keep an open-mind and don’t treat them like they are a freak of nature.
Everyone gets down in the dumps from time to time. We’d all get along better if we actually were honest about our feelings. Right now, I’m not 100% fine and that’s ok. But soon I will be! 🙂
Taryn Was Here 
Very good point. It’s like, if someone answered “actually I’m going through quite a depressive period right now,” unless you’re close to the person, most people would probably be scared off.
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Very true! For some reason feelings are a dangerous thing to have, lol. But really, how someone responds to that says more about them than the person going through a rough patch.
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I hear you! Still a stigma down here in Australia, too, despite all the rhetoric to the contrary.
Last year, I stopped asking people “How are you?” and these days ask “What’s new?” instead. It’s a far less emotionally charged question, in my opinion, and gives people more space to answer as truthfully and authentically as they wish!
Thank you for this post; I enjoyed reading it. For those of us who live with mental illness, that “everything’s OK” mask is so easy to wear.
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I’ll have to add that to my list of greetings, thanks!
I’m glad you enjoyed it! I fee that whether you’re dealing with mental illness or you’ve hit a rough patch, we all need to give each other a little peace and understanding. Maybe one day we can all shed our masks and be honest. It would make people happier in my opinion.
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I agree. It takes so much more energy to wear a mask, doesn’t it? And then there’s all the energy we pour into wearing masks to hide aspects of ourselves from ourselves … but that’s a story for another day! Lovely to have made this connection. I’m looking forward to reading more of your posts.
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So true! It’s quite daunting really. Plus you don’t fully connect with those around you thus deepening your feelings of being alone.
And likewise! I look forward to reading yours as well! 🙂
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Reblogged this on Living Well With Depression and commented:
I really enjoyed this read! Last year, I tried to replace “How are you?” with “What’s new?” as my greeting, the latter being more open and giving the respondee more room to maneouver, so to speak 🙂 How do you deal with the “How are you?” question?
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My standard reply to the “how are you?” question is “could be better, could be worse-what’s going on with you?” It works for me. Most people who “seem” happy go lucky are usually struggling with something in their lives, maybe not depression, but something…
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