To all my fellow humans who are going through tough times, feeling down and out, and just plain feeling defeated, this one is for you. Since I missed my Motivation Monday: Quote of the Day, I will leave you with my favorite inspirational song. If you remember the 90s, you’ll get a kick out of it! So here’s to you, the disenfranchised, here’s to looking up! “We’ll be singing, when we’re winning”. 🙂
So this whole “blogging regularly” thing is quite the task. It’s not that I don’t have anything to say, sometimes I just get so wrapped up in the delivery that I get overwhelmed and don’t say anything at all. Well, as a writer, whenever I go through a dry-spell, I become like a backed up toilet; clogged and unable to get the job done.
Honestly, writing is like breathing for me; it is essential to my wellbeing. So that said, I must write!!
Ok, now that I have my craziness/dramatics out of the way, I come bearing some pretty cool news. You know that secret writing thing I’ve been alluding to? Well, now I can share it! Last year in October I was approached to attend the HR Tech Conference by a little publication called Forbes. Yup! I was totally ecstatic (Also scared shitless, but I digress)! They needed a Las Vegas based writer to cover the conference for their BrandVoice channel and they reached out to silly old me!
I can’t get into too much of the particulars unfortunately, but the whole experience was AMAZING. Listening and being part of a conference where professionals met to understand the root-cause of talent acquisition problems was fascinating! It was an incredibly humbling and thrilling journey to say the least. It solidified that I love writing and being able to weave into various industries and learn about them. I felt like I was finally finding where I belonged.
In addition, the HR Tech conference hosted Third Eye Blind to play a concert! The first night of the conference, I was standing around with some newfound friends (yup, this introvert made friends, who knew?) in the front row at the House of Blues getting free drinks handed to us while belting out some 90’s alternative gold. It was a hell of a time. While I enjoyed the research aspect of the gig, I did have some learning to do on the editing side of things.
I learned a vast amount working with the editors at Forbes. They kicked my butt, but in the best possible way. I had to stretch my writing skills to the furthest literary mountains possible and get out of my comfort zone to meet their expectations. They’re high caliber for a reason, and the learning that occurred was invaluable.
So after some blood, sweat, and tears I am published and I could not be more pleased. I showed it to my parents, loved ones, and now I’m getting to share my excitement with my blogging buddies!! I’m not going to lie, being able to say that I have multiple bylines in Forbes exhilarating!!!
So without further ado, I Taryn am proudly showing off my work, feel free to check it out and let me know what you think! 🙂
Why hello there,
Long time no see!
First and foremost, I hope everyone had a splendid holiday! Mine was swell, except I spent most of it abandoning my family due to work obligations (yup, I am owned by the “man” once again, but more on that later).
Now that I’m finally starting to understand the work/life balance game, I’m back in the blogging world!!
I have some awesome news to share with you all, including being published in a prestigious magazine, but that is a different story for a different day. So on with the show!
I’m having the case of nostalgias lately. A.K.A., I’ve been sulking in a corner licking my wounds and moping like a whiny baby because life is unfair.This has been brought on due to the fact that I haven’t had very much downtime and I’m growing increasingly unhappy doing what I’m doing. Fortunately for me, my mom came into town for a couple days to visit and it was definitely much needed.
I’ve always appreciated my parents and have known how lucky I am that they are really awesome. Quite honestly, I prefer spending time with them than most people because they’re fun to be around. While my mom was in town, I got the pampered kid treatment; the dinners, hugs, and words of encouragement, which was exactly what I needed after the on the job drama I’ve had (I swear I’ll talk about it later).
On top of having my mommy in town. My best friend’s little brother, Micah, who’s like my own little bro happened to stop in Vegas and needed a place to crash, so he came to my house. I haven’t seen him since my trip to SD last year, so it was nice to catch up and see how he doing. Even though I only got to see him for an hour, it was really nice just to chat with someone from back home.
This weekend was fun with my mom, but I was super bummed to take her back to the airport. While driving, I felt like a little kid being taken to daycare for the first time. I did not want my mommy to GO! I even accidentally went to the wrong part of the airport. Alas, she is back in Monterey and I’m moping a bit.
I suppose being back with old familiar faces reawakened parts of me that have lain dormant for some time. There was a point in time in the world where I was fearless and took life by the balls! Where that girl is, I’m not entirely sure, but something tells me, she’s going to be resurfacing soon. 😉
I’ll admit it, I’m scared of the “B-word”. I’m talking about budget (not what you were thinking, huh?). When it comes to eating out, specialty coffee drinks, and other miscellaneous items, they add up. Many times we think convenience comes with a hefty price tag. It doesn’t always have to work that way. Check out my latest article on MillennialMagazine on 4 Simple Ways to Cut Everyday Expenses. Feel free to share your money saving tips too! Lord knows I need all the help I can get, lol!
So I am terrible about bragging about my writing exploits as of late, so I want to share with you guys my latest published work. Way back in June, I discovered this magazine call Millennial Magazine. It’s all about Gen Y and powered by Millennials. They were accepting writers and I knew I’d be a good fit so I quickly wrote the editor and pitched her a few ideas.
For me, pitching an editor is not scary. In fact, it is my favorite part of the process. I introduced myself and spoke on my passion about talking about myself (typical millennial, lol) and sent her some samples and some possible topics. Then I hit “send” and waiting eagerly for the response. Within a few hours, she got back to me and said my ideas were great and to move forward with them.
For a few days I was on cloud 9 enjoying life and feeling validated. She loved my work and ideas! It felt amazing to receive positive feedback. So needless to say my ego was pretty inflated; at a healthy rate though. 😉
After the acceptance high wore off, a huge sense of insecurity crept over more. “Am I good enough?” “Will the editor like my work?” were the thoughts that plagued my anxiety-riddled brain. I became stuck and fearful that I could not get it done. Instead, I avoided it like the bubonic plague and just let the project fall to the wayside. I was so bummed and disappointed with myself for following through, but my fear and anxiety had gotten the better of me.
Fast forward 2 months and I still had not written the article. So finally, I took a good look in the mirror, and spoke a few positive affirmations and vowed that I’d get this article written come hell or high-water. So a few hours later and a few revisions (done at a Starbucks, no less), my article was complete!
After I finished my article, I sent it to the editor who had positive things to say about it. I made a few corrections and resubmitted it. I was incredibly proud of myself for finishing the article and that it was going to be published. What I was most proud of was despite my initial hesitation, I managed to follow through, and complete it. Maybe it was because the article is a topic that I relate with, but for me, when I have work that hits close to home, I have a tough time getting through with the project for fear that I am not doing it justice. Then I realized I’m not doing anything if I don’t actually do it, so here it is!
The Published Work
The cool thing about my article was that it was published incredibly quickly and I got a chance to show my friends and family. Normally I write a lot of corporate copy so it’s not exactly interesting or shareable, so it was nice to have done some work that I could share with everyone. So without further ado, here is my article! Just click the link below.
All in all, I’ve realized that the writing process does not have to be as scary as I’ve made it. Also that I love what I do. If you guys have any stories about submitting work, I’d love to hear them! 🙂
Submitting/sharing written work can be an extremely anxiety filled endeavor for a lot of writers. The moment you share your writing with someone, it feels like you’ve exposed a sacred document out into the world where everyone can judge and critique it. That my friends is a very scary mentality to have and truthfully, it was one that I held onto.
The one thing I’ve been finding out is that many writers are so nervous about sharing their work, that a lot of the time they don’t. Or, they decide not to pitch their ideas because of what an editor might say. I will admit that it’s been refreshing to know that I’m not the only who gets anxious.
What bums me out that there is a lot of stuff that is going unpublished due to the fears a writer may have. In an effort to help out my fellow writers, here are some tips/ideas that I try to remember when it comes to pitching ideas/submitting content.
1. Realize That Pitching is Nerve-wracking for Everyone
If submitting content was super easy, I guarantee you that a lot more of it would be happening. Sure it’s natural to get nervous about sending your stuff out into the world. Just be sure to not let the fear stop you from submitting it.
2. Editors are People Too
Believe it or not, editors are human beings. They are not waiting anxiously in their inbox to reject the next pitch from a writer. On the contrary, most editors I’ve worked with are extremely awesome and very helpful. Don’t forget they need your stories so they’ll work with you to make that happen.
3. Separate Yourself From Your Work
Being rejected or being asked to make revisions are a reality of being a writer. I’ll admit that it can wound my pride momentarily. Make sure you remember that the editor is not rejecting you, they are rejecting the article. Trust me, there is a difference. So when you get rejected, it does not mean that you are a terrible writer, it just means the article is not what the editor is looking for.
4. Take Rejection with a Grain of Salt
Your writing can feel like a part of you so it’s natural to feel connected to it. Like I said, your rejection is not a reflection of you. It’s normal to feel discouraged when you’ve experienced rejection. That being said, don’t dwell on it too long. Figure out where you can make the proper adjustments and try again.
5. If at First You Don’t Succeed, Try Try Again
When I first started pitching articles, I was terrible at receiving feedback. It actually made me hesitant to put myself out there again. However, I quickly realized that I can’t work on any projects without first putting myself out there. If you get rejected, keep on pitching. The more you pitch, the easier it becomes and eventually an editor will say yes!
So those are my guidelines that help me get over the anxiety hump of pitching articles. What do you do to help yourself spread your work? What was the most challenging pitch you’ve done and how did you overcome it? Or, what is stopping you from getting published? Let me know 🙂
Ever notice how difficult it is to commit to say, anything?
Remember when you made plans with friends to meet up at the movies? Well back in the dark ages, there was no way really communicate with your friends, your parents just simply dropped you off at the theater and you all magically showed up. What a concept?! I’m sure this practice seems archaic to younger folks, but back then, when plans were made, you kept them, because there was no way to back out.
The one thing I love about technology is that we can instantly get in contact with one another. It also allows us to be flaky little sons of guns as well. Since we can easily talk to each other and make plans, it ultimately gives us the option to say no right up to the event itself. Why is it that we don’t follow through with plans then turn around and complain about not having reliable friends? It’s like a never-ending conundrum. Let’s be honest, how many times have you made plans to only bail on them at the last minute? I’ve done it more times than I’d like to admit. Interestingly enough, I was talking about this with a girl I met at the dog park today and she admitted to being in the same boat as me. So in an effort to live more organically, I’ve decided to opt into a more 90s kind of life.
When I make plans with friends, I’ve decided that unless I’m having a dire medical emergency, I’m following through. I’m going to pretend as though my phone does not exist and that texting has not yet been invented. Why? Simply because if I “don’t have the means to communicate” I have to assume that the other person is waiting for me therefore making me obligated to show up. I’ve actually done it a couple times, and dare I say, I’ve enjoyed my outings. So here’s to a little personal responsibility and enjoying each other’s company “IRL” 😉
Have you ever bailed on a friend for whatever reason? Let me know 🙂
So I’m gonna go on a little rant here. I was on Facebook (first mistake) and saw that an acquaintance posted a list from Thought Catalog titled: 25 Things Every Woman Should Have By The Time She Turns 25. Naturally I clicked on it (second mistake). Then finally, I read the whole entire thing (third and final mistake) It lists a bunch of things like “having a best friend that’s like a sister” and “having thank you cards in your drawer”, the list goes on and on. Please feel free to read it to get the gist of my annoyance. While I understand that the writer is trying to “empower women” and all that jazz, I can’t help but be supremely irritated by lists of this nature.
1. They are just as oppressive as the oppression they are trying to go against
I can tell you right now that I know a bunch of people (myself) included who do not fit this criteria who are either 25 or near it. So apparently I’m doing life wrong according to this list. Let me go crawl into bed now that I’ve realized I’m a failure at life. WRONG. The author I guess identifies herself as a feminist, yet uses words and phrases such as, “tact, grace, and the ability to find shoes off of a 40% off rack” to describe how women should act or aspire to be by 25. I’m not even going to get into the gender connotations those words and behaviors imply. If you were going for gender equality, boy you sure nailed it. She also talks about the confidence to eat whatever and to be herself. Hm, how about the confidence to realize and justify that this list is chock full of romanticized crap that I nor anyone else has to adhere to. I mean seriously? How about this, I’ll “be myself” and forget that I ever read this list. Anyone (both male and female) should be able to live their life without having to check with a list to see if they’re doing it right. Life is not a “one size fits all” endeavor and everyone comes into their own path in a unique way.
2. It perpetuates the “Should” mentality
Everything on this list tells you what you “should” be doing. People are impressionable and by creating “standards” for them to live by can make them feel like crap if they haven’t achieved them. One of the biggest problems I see in our (millennial) generation is that we compare ourselves to each other way too much. The only thing that you “should” know when you’re 25 is that life is a confusingly beautiful adventure and it’s yours to do with as you see fit.
3. It is saying that every 25 year old has the exact same aspirations and expectations out of life
We are all different in this amazing and crazy world. My “norm” may be completely off base of what your “norm” is. And you know what? That is perfectly ok. We do not have to see eye to eye on everything, nor should we aspire to be cookie cutter drones. The dangerous thing about lists like these is that the author is perpetuating her sense of normalcy onto others and is passing it off like it’s dogma from the heavens. Who cares if you waited until you were 35 to learn how to change a tire. Maybe you hate shopping and are not savvy at a clearance rack. The beauty of life is that, as long as we’re still on this earth, we have the ability to learn, grow, and change when the time is right for each and every individual.There are no time limits on growth and all expectations need to be thrown out of the window.
Ok, now that I’ve said my peace, my only “list” for you is to live your life in a manner that makes you happiest. So long as you are not hurting others, be free to be whoever you are. Don’t take lists like these to heart, if you are 25 and you don’t have 3 months of livable income in the bank, don’t fret, most people of that age don’t (I mean, student loans, anyone?). Let’s stop placing our expectations of one another and just enjoy life as it comes. Lastly, if you value your life at all, forget that Thought Catalog ever existed. You’re self esteem and wellbeing will thank you for it. Also feel free to ignore my advice, I don’t have all of the answers either, nor do I want to place my values on others. On a side note, today is the 1 year anniversary of this blog (yay!) I will do a post on that later, as for now I’m off to find a 40% off shoe rack… 😉
Yesterday I wrote about receiving constructive criticism and how I was going to “learn from the experience” and all the jazz. Well, to be honest, I have not written nor researched the project I’m supposed to turn in. Instead I’ve been licking my wounds, sulking while playing Tetris, and avoiding all responsibility. Why? Honestly, because I’m not use to being told my half-assed work doesn’t cut the mustard. I’m intelligent, no really, I’m pretty damn smart and I’ve been getting away with so much bullshit because of it. With that being said, it’s given me the ability to slack off and still come out the victor for many years thus making me arrogant, a little entitled, and possessing a gross sense of overconfidence in my procrastination abilities. In laymen’s terms, my shit doesn’t stink. However yesterday, I had to wake up and smell the poo.
Being told that my work wasn’t good enough was like a bullet to the heart, granted I really did not put in the effort. To give you a better understanding, I wrote a 1000 word article on a topic I had absolutely no idea about in under an hour. That time includes the research that I did for the article. Of course on the shallow spectrum the article is amazing, it offers some basic insight on the subject. However the client does not want a fluff piece, they want a serious in depth article and are shelling out legit dinero for me to do so. So why I thought a bullshit puff piece was going to work is beyond me.
Currently I’m stuck in the land of anxiety and avoidance. My fear is that I could write this article and do it justice, thus greatly changing up my M.O. and forcing me to “try”. On the other hand, I could put my blood, sweat, and tears into this article and still not be good enough. The more I talk with friends and peers, I realize I’m not alone in the conundrum. My people (millennials) suffer from fear of rejection. It’s true, ever wonder why most 20somethings don’t commit to say, anything? It’s because in order to succeed in relationships, work, life, etc you have to make an effort. Some of these efforts we win, and some we lose. Let’s be honest, losing sucks and we don’t want to do it. So there’s this lackadaisical approach to a lot of endeavors. We mask these fears by offering up explanations like “focusing on my career” or “I like not having to be tied down to stuff”. That’s code word for being scared of commitment because of the possibility of failure. As I said yesterday, I think this stems from not being exposed to enough rejection. I’ve rarely opened myself up to the possibility of rejection. This has left me extremely sensitive to criticism/rejection, so much so that I’m hindering myself.
In order for me to really grow from this experience, I need to take a good look in the mirror and honestly accept my part in my lack of effort. As much as I hate to admit it, I’m going to need to experience some good old fashion rejection to become more accustomed to it. Now, I’m done throwing my pity party and I want to experience the world come what may. I need to do that article, not because of monetary reasons, but to show myself that life requires participation. Failure is part of the equation and I must embrace it. With that being said, off I go, shutting down the anxious thoughts in my brain to conquer this fear! My challenge to my fellow millennials is to do something that you’re afraid of. It’ll make you better in so many ways. 🙂
Social Media is the beer goggles of people’s lives. A person’s life is a 3 in reality; add a filter, it becomes a 10.
Social Media is like the porn of real life. It’s doesn’t show all the gross stuff, just the “finished product” which in itself is nowhere near the real thing.
Don’t believe me? Look at your friends’ pins on Pinterest, their statuses on Facebook, their photos on Instagram, or their posts on Tumblr.
To be fair, these apps allow us to capture great moments of our lives and to hold on to them. They also create this sickening nostalgia that makes people believe that everyone else is better off than they are. We’ve created a vortex “anywhere but here” or “why not me?”. We are constantly in comparison with each other whether it’s intentional or not. I for one am definitely guilty. Let’s be honest, how much time do you spend trying to get the perfect shot to put on some social media site instead of actually enjoying the experience itself? If I had a $1 for every nostalgic quote or super snazzy photo that I’ve come across (or have done myself) on a daily basis, I could prolong being a bum for an eternity.
– Here’s a photo that I took in San Diego. Worry free TJ living it up. What you don’t know is that I was stuck on conference calls and dealing with my maniac boss on the majority of my stay and that I was miserable. Such a perfect life, go on, envy me.
I always hear that “millennials“ are self indulgent and are never happy with what they have. Well, if older generations had the same technology to connect and interact with people all over the world when they were younger, do you really think they’d be any different? I think not.
I can’t speak for everyone, but for me, I’ve noticed that I have been caught up in this cycle. Being 20 something and still figuring it out with every step that I take, it’s easy to look at a bunch of filtered photos and super positive status updates and feel like the world is in on something that I’m not. Don’t get me wrong, I’m incredibly fortunate to have been able to take that picture in San Diego and to have even gone. I’m just merely pointing out that not everything is as it seems.
My new goal for myself is to take a chill pill on being caught up with social media and actually give this “real life” bit a shot. Of course I’ll still blog and use these apps, but in moderation. I don’t hate social media, in fact I think it’s a great tool. I mean for me to be able to talk to someone across the country let alone the world in real time, it’s incredible! However with great technology comes great responsibility (You can thank Uncle Ben for that one… hehe). Bottom line is no one person’s life is perfect, no matter how many filters or philosophical quotes they put on it. Especially me, I don’t have all the answers (Kanye’s rant at Sway came to mind as I wrote that, lol), and I certainly don’t pretend to. Everybody poops; and chances are it is smelly 😉