Freelancing is not for the faint of heart. It can be great, it’s not always sunshine and daisies. While you technically are your own boss and there is a lot of freedom in the role, it takes a lot of dedication, discipline, and patience. But who wants to be successful? Ain’t nobody got time for that. So to help my fellow writers out, here’s a list of 5 ways you too can kill it working from home.
1. Don’t Go Outside
Seriously, DON”T. GO. OUTSIDE. EVER. Who needs vitamin D anyway. Going outside is for chumps. Be a hero and stay inside, in the dark, under the covers, while slaving away on your laptop. You don’t need to feel the sun on your face to feel alive. The backlight glimmer of your laptop brings the hope of anxiety and potential emotional breakdown. You can’t get that kind of joy from the outside world.
2. Don’t Exercise
Who needs all the benefits of endorphins? Instead, sit your ass on your couch and enjoy the Duck Dynasty marathon. You don’t have to be about that exercise life. Even better, order take out, all the time. Let those fitness freaks do all the running. You’re doing a different kind of marathon… a Netflix marathon, that is.
3. Don’t Budget Your Money
Budgeting is for wimps. You have a rockstar life to maintain. Who cares if your workload isn’t the steadiest? You have to show your friends that you’re a baller without a boss. So live it up. You can always block the calls from debt collectors
4. Don’t Talk to Anyone
You’re an artist. Remember, people are the enemy. The perks of working from home means that you don’t have to interact with anyone. That line “no man is an island” is a load of crap. Creating literary genius requires isolation from the outside world. I mean it worked for Hemingway, right?
5. Don’t Have a Routine
This one is incredibly important. If you truly want to be at the top of your game, you must not have a plan, like, ever. Just slap a bunch of crap on the wall and see what sticks. Work in circles aimlessly. Don’t ask for help either, that’s the lame way out. You’re on this road along… forever… for all eternity. Help is for the weak, you must endure.
Follow these 5 steps and you too can have a rewarding, amazing, anxiety filled depressing career… errrr what???
Ok, ok… so I may be pulling your leg a little. Going down the road less traveled requires more work than one might think.While working for yourself has its rewarding moments, if you do not keep a healthy balance of work and life, it can go south very quickly. In fact, if you don’t pace yourself, you could go bonkers (trust me, it’s happened to yours truly). Get a support system and remember to have a life outside of your work. Freelance responsibly, my friends!