vulnerability – Taryn Was Here

“What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?

That quote is on a magnet that I put on my fridge about a year ago. When I bought it, my thought was I’d see it everyday when I pulled out my creamer for my coffee then magically become motivated to test my limits. The reality is, that most times I don’t even look at that magnet, nor do I venture out into unknown territory often. I ran into my neighbor again this morning as I was finishing my walk with Abbey. Honestly every time I see her I really do believe that sometimes things do happen for a reason. This morning was no different.

Last week, I had been struggling to progress with my freelance writing. I’ve been meaning to update my LinkedIn profile and put of samples of my work. The actual task of updating my profile is quite simple. You just have to update your career and upload some documents and Presto! You’re in business. If it’s so easy to do that, you’re probably wondering why on earth have I not done so? The simple answer is that, I’m scared to put my stuff out there. Once I hit that submit button, my hopes, fears, aspirations, are available to the world to do with whatever they choose. That type of vulnerability is terrifying to me. Granted, I realized that one of my key points in my post 2 weeks ago. I can’t very well encourage you all to be vulnerable if I’m not willing to do so myself, now can I?

Talking it out with my neighbor made me realize how much I hold myself back. My mind was working in “negative thought” overdrive. By holding onto negative thoughts and promoting self-doubt. I’ve talked myself out of doing simple tasks for fear of being judged. When I got home, I took a good look in the mirror and I’m resolving to make a change. I need to tear down the walls that I’ve built up and just get on with it. I am challenging myself to get out of my head and start living presently. And since it’s the beginning of the month, the timing couldn’t be better.

June is the month where I break out and really challenge myself both personally and professionally. I will update my LinkedIn profile and get over the fear of judgement. After all, in order to succeed, you have to start. In order to keep myself accountable, I’ll check in with my progress here and give an honest update with how it’s all going. My hope is that you’ll join me and stretch your minds to conquer whatever holds you back this month. Here’s to a growth-filled June. 🙂

Have you ever sat in a crowd of people and felt like you were the only person in the room? If there is one thing that I’ve learned these past 5 months is that no man is an island. You need people in your life, both professionally and personally. I will admit, I tend to try to go the lone wolf route and I can guarantee I’ve fallen flat on my face because of it. Now I’m understanding that I need to connect and also ask for help and that it’s ok to do so. There’s no point in trying to reinvent the wheel, especially if there are tons of good ones out there already.If I had to offer any advice to my millennial cohorts it would be this:

1. Be Honest and Ask For Help

If you do not understand something, talk with someone who does. I cannot tell you how many countless endeavors, I‘ve been at the mercy of because I did not want to appear “incompetent”. This has been a tough habit to kick, but the funny thing is, the more I communicate my needs, the more I connect with others. I find that when I’m being emotionally honest and am investing in a conversation, I’m getting more intrinsic value out of it. That only happens when you are honest with what you want and seek out others to make it happen.

2. Be Vulnerable

I used to think that being vulnerable was a sign of weakness, and boy was I totally wrong. Whether you’re summoning up the courage to talk to the dude you creep on at the coffee shop, or asking for more responsibility at work, you have to be transparent. Sure there is a possibility that you may not get the result you were hoping for, but you wouldn’t get it anyway if you did nothing altogether. And who knows, you could have a hot date and a raise, you have to put it out there first.

3. Invest in Others

In the culture of “now now now” I find it commonplace for people to not put much effort into their relationships with others. You would think with all this technology surrounding communication, we’d be pro’s at interpersonal communication, but that is just not so. We’re so plugged in looking for the next best thing we don’t realize that what we’re looking for could be right in front of us. It just takes a little time and elbow grease to get there. Instead of dismissing one another, try and actually get to know people. I’ve been working on getting to know others and not writing people off, and you know what? Some of those people aren’t half bad. Had I just gone with the first impression and kept my elitist attitude, I would not have seen the awesomeness of some people I am proud to call friends. I could spend a lot more time on this and maybe I will in another post, but if you take anything away from this, I hope it’s that we all need someone to lean on at some point. Whether it’s a friend, family member, or significant other, you have to have someone you can confide in. Of course, this can be absolutely terrifying in the beginning. Sharing feelings? Yuck, who does that? But once you start it’s one of the most rewarding experiences one can have. So I challenge everyone to ask for help, or talk to a stranger sometime this coming weekend. Who knows where it could take you? 🙂

dannykurily.buzznet.com

Taryn Was Here

Tag: vulnerability

Stop Thinking, Start Doing

“What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?